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19 & 20 October 2024 (Pastoral Page) THE PURPOSE OF RELATIONSHIPS

By Asst Ps Lai Keet Keong


Philippians 2:5, “In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus.”

 

How we relate with one another reflects what we believe about God. God is a relational God. He created us to be relational creatures who learn and reflect the true meaning of love, faith and hope through our relating with another.

 

The Apostle Paul exhorted believers in the Church in Philippi to have the mindset of Christ when they relate with fellow believers. The word “mindset” refers to one's values, thinking and binding convictions. In other words, God had purposed relationships with others to be one of His litmus tests of our spirituality.

 

Do we bear the mindset of Christ through our words of kindness? Do we value others above ourselves through taking initiative to reconcile, having courage to humbly ask for forgiveness, and extending grace to forgive others who have wronged or misunderstood us?

 

One thing I have learnt about relationships is that it changes us. We learn more about ourselves through conflicts, and we receive a revelation of what we are really made of. Someone said, “Christians are a lot like tea bags. You don’t know what they are made of until you put them in hot water.” God never wastes opportunities. Even conflicts are part of God’s loving purposes for having us in a greater community instead of having us be alone or remain in our closed cliques. As Proverbs 27:17 says, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” Our interactions with each other are meant to make us better.

 

The problem is that when we experience relationship difficulties, we too often respond in inappropriate ways which compound the situation. We do what comes naturally to us in our own human weakness. We act out of our insistence that we are right; we want our way, and hold on to personal biases. And often, these responses can be traced back to personal hurts and baggages, or fears which we fiercely hope to avoid. Because relationships are messy and painful, some believers draw back from them. As a result, God’s purpose for community is compromised.

 

I have no doubt that God has a special purpose for relationships. In His love He wants to transform our character to be more like Him. May we be reminded to do not what comes naturally to us in the flesh, but what comes supernaturally to us by the Word of God and the Spirit of God working in our hearts – to care for each other in our relationships with one another.

 

Finally, Paul exhorted in Ephesians 4:32, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” May our relationships reflect the divine love we have received, and may we be a channel of God's mercy and reconciliation in a fractured world.

 

Let us cherish the gift of human relationships, tending them with care as precious reflections of God's love for us all. God wants to reveal His purposes and heart to you in every relationship and transform us to be more like Jesus as we humbly obey and abide in His grace.

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