By Ps Lim Wei-en
One of the great blessings in being a 66-year-old church is that we have different generations worshipping in the same building each weekend. Our oldest worshippers, some of whom were our pioneers, hail from what sociologists call the “Silent Generation” (born 1928-1945). We also have a healthy representation of worshippers from the other generations: “Baby Boomer” (born 1946-1964), “Generation X” (born 1965-1980), “Millennials” (Born 1981-1996), “Generation Z” (born 1997-2012), “Generation Alpha” (Born 2013-Present).
To be part of a church represented by six generations is a blessing because the potential for mutual edification and encouragement is great. But that potential can only be realised if we move from a multi to inter-generational church.
A multi-generational church is one in which multiple generations are part of the church in one way or another. These different generations may even be present in the same space (e.g. worship service) but there is no meaningful interaction between the generations. An inter-generational church, however, is one where different generations are not only present with but actively engaging one another in spiritual conversations, serving together, learning from and caring for one another.
At present, The Bible Church is more of a multi-generational than inter-generational church. Part of that is because as the church grew in numbers, space constraints became real, and we understood more about the benefits of discipling people according to generational needs, we segmented our worship services into age groups (i.e. Kids-for-Christ, Teenacity, Crux). As such, we reduced the opportunities for worshippers of different generations to worship in the same space (thankfully, we still have the children, youths and young adults join the main services, on average, once a month). Part of that is also because we – this starts from the leadership but includes all of us – have not fully embraced the beauty and goodness of being intergenerational.
As much as the leadership needs to rethink and reorganise the church to become more intergenerational, I’d urge each worshipper to prayerfully think about how we can make spiritual friends across generational lines – not just for the church’s sake but for our own sakes. As much as I enjoy hanging out with my peers, personally, I have been blessed with “uncles” and “aunties” as well as older mentors who have cared for and guided me in my life. Likewise, I have been blessed by being an older brother and mentor to many young people. I can truly say my life would not have been as rich, nor my growth as great, if I did not have these intergenerational friendships. A few benefits I have experienced in this regard are:
Wisdom. I have gained much from the life experiences and faith journeys of my older brothers and sisters. Hearing how they made godly life decisions (e.g. who to marry, what to do with my money, how to discern career choices etc.) in a way that honours God, as well as how they overcame life crises, setbacks and failures with God’s help has taught me how God’s Word may be applied practically to different situations. Younger, godly believers have much wisdom to offer too. As they stay faithful to God in the face of today’s challenges and seductions, they teach me that the fear of God is the beginning of wisdom, regardless of one’s age.
Encouragement. I do not think I am alone is saying that I need encouragement to press on in the Christian faith. When I hear an older brother or sister affirm me for a godly choice I have made or a good work I have done, I feel encouraged to know that someone who has walked with God for a longer time sees that I am on the right path. When I hear a younger brother or sister thank me for opening my home to them, listening to them, teaching them or serving them in some way, it encourages me to know that, in some small way, my attempts to share God’s love and pass the faith on are not in vain.
Spiritual Renewal. Having been a Christian for close to 40 years, there are times I go through dry seasons in my walk with God or am tempted to cruise along in my faith journey. Seeing older Christians still fervently and joyfully desiring to know God and make him known in their latter years helps me to keep going. Seeing younger Christians deny themselves and taking up their crosses as they follow Jesus reinvigorates my own zeal in my walk with God.
What would it take for each of us to personally embrace spiritual friends across generational lines?
Willingness to be uncomfortable. Getting to know someone from another generation is akin to doing cross-cultural missions – we may find we are entering a strange, new world! And in that strange, new world, the way the other thinks, speaks or acts may not be what we are used to, and that may make us uncomfortable. To be sure, the feeling of discomfort subsides once we get to know the other well, but for a start, we must be willing to be uncomfortable in the presence of someone new.
Willingness to listen and speak with grace. Each generation has their own impressions and prejudices about the other (e.g. “young people these days…” OR “ok boomer”). Each generation thinks differently about issues like money, marriage, sex, work, church. As we get to know the other, we must be willing to set aside our preconceived biases and listen patiently to the other, while speaking only that which builds up. We may not have to agree on everything, and one party may even have an unbiblical view of an issue, but we can still demonstrate grace in our listening and speech even when discussing these differences.
Willingness to point each other to God. Intergenerational spiritual friendships have the same goal as all spiritual friendships – to point each other to the Triune God. “There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.” (Eph. 4:4-6) Instead of trying hard to find common ground in our hobbies and perspectives, we can embrace our differences yet seek to help the other find hope in the God who is our true source of unity.
The Christian faith is passed down from generation to generation. May each worshipper in The Bible Church endeavour to humbly learn from the faithful who have gone before us and pass down a legacy of faith to those after us. In that way, we will take steps to move from a multi-generational to an inter-generational church, all worshipping the same God who loves us and has called us to Himself.
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